September 12, 2011

The Wild Things

This is what I want it to look like in my head right now, the thought processes that would be marching through my brain and blythely onto the page in a perfect world.

Here's what it ACTUALLY looks like in my mind at the moment.

Those of you who have children instantly feel my pain, and need no other explanations, I'm sure.  For those of you who don't, here is a quick, albeit intentionally unhelpful, description of what's happening in this scene.

  1. Yes, two peas are wearing berets in this picture, and no, they don't have measles--they have freckles.
  2. Why yes, now that you mention it, that cucumber-shaped superhero is wearing toilet plungers on his mask.
  3. That IS a tomato, standing there looking put upon and put out by what he is putting up with.  That is his usual expression, by-the-way, and I know how he feels.
  4. Indeed, the musical notes flying at random through the air are sadly misshapen, and becoming ever more so the more times they flit through my head like a needle stuck in the groove of a broken record.
If you're baffled--and I'd be concerned about you if you weren't--I can only say this: check out a DVD of a kid's show called "Veggie Tales" from your local library, watch five minutes of it, and all will become clear.  Also, since my daughter usually spends at least one night of each week at Grandma's house, my in-laws are NEVER ALLOWED TO GO ON VACATION AGAIN!!!!  One week of preparations, plus two weeks in Hawaii, equals three weeks that Brigid and I have spent constantly together without a break of any kind.  (I am not exaggerating.  I took two hours off to go to the doctor, and Brigid does consistently sleep in her own room; that's it.  She even wanders into the bathroom when I'm in there to make sure I haven't vanished off the face of the earth in the last two minutes since she saw me.)  My daughter and I absolutely dote on each other, are devoted to one another, and she's getting tired of my company at the moment.  Everybody needs a break.

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